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Je Ne Regrette Rien…? March 15, 2006

Posted by espritnoir in Bandstand Stories, I, Me and Myself....
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There are some very few times in life when i actually regret being single. Well, not exactly regret, but you know, there are those moments when I would have preferred to have a “significant other” in my life and be one in somebody else’s. Like last weekend, I was driving back home after dinner, and suddenly I decided to head to Bandstand instead. So, I’m at Bandstand (thankfully at least post midnight its relatively less crowded), at 1.00 am in the morning, and I am on the promenade walking all by myself. It was all there. People hanging out, trying to extend the weekend by as much as possible, before we all returned to our humdrum work the next day. The stray couples walking up and down the promenade, holding hands, just enjoying the time spent together. The dark sea spread for miles ahead of me; the near full moon lighting up the waters underneath. It was such a pretty postcard picture, and I so wanted to share it with somebody. I actually looked around, just wishing that there was somebody there that I knew. Somebody who I cared about. And who would enjoy spending time with me. And as I watched the waves roll in, I must confess I felt the green eyed monster kick in. Envy at the other couples around me. At the realization that I had nobody to share the beautiful moonlit night by the sea with. Even a phone call from somebody would have been a sign from heaven. But, like so many other times, the moment passed, nobody called, I didn’t bump into anybody accidentally, and nothing happened that night that would have made a great movie one day.

But, that night it did get me thinking. Of all the small things that me and other single guys like me, have to do without, which a ‘committed’ guy would probably just take for granted (that’s a serious generalization, I know, but come on, but humor meJ)

So, for all you committed guys out there, be thankful for all of this and a lot more :

When you catch the faintest whiff of your favorite perfume (maybe “Provocative”;) on your woman. And your knees turn to jello in an instant.Every time she accidentally turns the channel to MTV, just as Kimi is about to shoot ahead of Shumacher on the crucial last lap at Monza.

Whenever she turns to you to help her with her hung Windows XP. Hey, you both know, she could have restarted the damn thing herself, but she knows how you love to be her Knight-In-Shining-Armour.

The times she went for a horror movie with you, and screamed, clung on to your arm and hid her face in your sleeve whenever the creepy music came on. That’s why you chose that movie in the first place!

Whenever she asks you give her a neck rub. Admit it, you enjoy it more than she does. Or better still, she gives you one herself.

How peaceful she looks when she’s asleep. If I ever fall in love, I’ll make it a point to get up 45 minutes before she does everyday, just to sit by the bed and watch my pretty one while she sleeps.

You lean in for a quick hug, and the fragrance of her just washed hair hits you like a 10 ton bomb. And you never want to let go. Ever.

And a zillion other small things that makes her so special.

So, there you have it. All you committed guys (and gals), call up your loved one and tell her (or him) that you love her. Go ahead, make her day.

And all you single people out there… hang in there. Hope you find your someone special soon.

As for me, I’m listening to Edith Piaf, and she speaks for both of us when she says, “Je ne regrette rien…” Neither do I… at least until the next time I’m at Bandstand all alone in the middle of the night.

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Comments»

1. poemer - March 17, 2006

I have Bandstand moments too, but am lucky enough to have children. They leave little time for reflection and fill my life in magnificent ways. With that being said, I can commiserate fully with your heightened sense of isolation. There are certain moments when we need someone else to be of the same mind or become the same body or somehow be the wall off which our echoes resound.
Some of us are good at self-definition….we don’t require a significant other to prop up our identity. We don’t need someone else’s context to exist. I’m one of those people, and YET how many of my poems query my single fate?
I don’t regret much. But I do wonder when I’m going to find someone who will wake up 45 minutes early just to watch me sleep. Very romantic–I like that!

2. EspritNoir - March 21, 2006

@ poemer : well, i believe whats the point of being in love, if you dont take that extra effort to get up before your beloved, and watch over her as she sleeps. I think its one of the most beautiful experiences in life. i couldnt have put it better myself whn u say that some of us are good at self-definition, having the ability to NOT justify our existence based upon somebody else’s. But, those “Bandstand moments” do hve a nasty habit of creeping in on you when u least expect them, dont they? well, i do hope you find that somebody to watch over you soon. take care:)

3. poemer - March 23, 2006

I think I take too much care. But maybe someday….–>


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